Two thousand twelve: R&R

No no, it's not Rehat dan Rawat.

It's Reflections and Resolutions.

Biasalah awal-awal tahun semua pun nak post pasal the year that has gone and the new year that has come.  Myself included. It's a good way for me to start writing again for I have forgotten how writing in here is actually a good mental therapy.

2011 was a pretty good year to me.

1. Started off with getting the offer letter from USM in December 2010 and spent three months after that looking for universities and PhD projects.

2. Resigned from my job at the most appropriate time in June and helped Mama with her business in July and August.

3. Embarked on my PhD journey at Nottingham in September.

4. Got my first nephew just last week.

5. Went through a series of heartaches *ayat nak gempak je kau*. Crushed on someone, and got crashed later.

6. Strengthen the bond with my girls.

7. Found new love. *ihiks*

On my way back to Nottingham from Birmingham Airport last weekend, I was looking at my nephew's picture on Facebook and then it hit me, how instant our lives can change, how time flies. I still remember the moment when my sister broke the news to me about her being pregnant, and now she's given birth to the cute lil boy named Raaid Riffqy. Then I reflect on how not grateful I am for all the good things that Allah has given me. I always complained to Mama that I don't have this and that. When I heard the news of someone getting married or having a baby I couldn't help being a little envious. I forgot that Allah has given me rezeki in another form. It might not be a life partner or a baby, but I am here halfway across the globe away from my family, doing my doctorate degree. Who knows those people whom I am envious of wish to be in my shoes right now. Manusia memang tak pernah puas. 'Grass is always greener on the other side' lah konon. I pray that I will be contented with what I have now and leave it to Allah to do the rest. Amin. Belajar bersyukur dengan apa yang ada, rezeki orang lain lain.

So for 2012, my resolutions would be..

1. To get married. 

Kidding! Baru je cakap biar Allah do the rest. Hehe. Actually it was in plan 4 years ago. My ex and I got together on 12.12.06 so we being 'gatal' planned to get married on 12.12.12 *sungguh tak matang*. Now dah tak jadi apa, bila fikir balik lawak lah pulak. After all 12.12.12 is on Wednesday, siapa nak datang majlis kau nyah?? But tell me siapa yang couple but not think about marrying that person, kan?  *Bila check calendar, sah tahun ni ramai orang kawin on 10.11.12 sebab hari Sabtu. Selamat pengantin baru in advanced lah ye!*

2. To be more disciplined. 

Doing a PhD is not merely about doing a novel research, writing that thick dissertation and attaining that 'Dr' title at the end. It is also about learning about yourself - how you manage time, plan your work, work-life balance, how to manage stress etc. I must admit I'm struggling with time management. Since there's no punch card or whatever system in placed, I could come and leave anytime I want. All this while, the one thing that keep me on the track is 'the stare and the mouth'. You know when you come in late, people give you this look macam you buat salah terbesar di dunia and when you leave early, you bump into someone and he/she would say, 'Is it 5 already?' Like seriously? But thanks to those people at least I try to come before 10 and leave after 4.30 :P But seriously I should and must do better than that so that I will finish on time, and reunited with my loved ones at the end of 2014. Amin.

I guess that's the only resolution for this year. Other than that it's same old same old, no need for a new year to be a better daughter, sister, aunt *this is new*, friend, and most importantly, a better Muslim. :)

Let's hold on to each other when the going gets tough, shall we?

Happy new year, everyone!